There’s a part of leadership that isn’t often talked about. It’s not found in strategy books or performance reviews. It doesn’t come with applause or clear metrics. It’s the deeply personal, often private journey of resetting - of pausing to ask, “Am I still being true to who I’ve become?” I’ve had to ask myself this question more than once.
Over the years, I’ve worn many hats, serving in high-capacity roles, mentoring others, and building vision-driven work. On the outside, it may have looked like steady progress. But inwardly, there were seasons where I had to pause, take stock, and admit that something needed to shift.
There was a point in my journey where I realised I was no longer fuelled by what used to excite me. I had built systems and structures that served others well, but I wasn’t sure if they still served me. I found myself wondering, “Who am I becoming in the process of building all this?” That moment of honesty was a turning point. I took a deliberate pause - not to quit, but to reset. To realign. To revisit what mattered most.
It would have been easier to keep going. To stay in motion. To tell myself I was just tired or at a low point. But I’ve learnt that when you ignore the nudge to pause, the cost quietly builds up:
- Your decisions lose clarity.
- Your voice becomes faint under the weight of other people’s expectations.
- Your energy becomes scattered, even as your calendar stays full.
- You become resentful
Leadership without alignment becomes heavy. And over time, even success begins to feel hollow.
I remember attending a particular event, a moment I nearly talked myself out of because “there was too much going on.” But sitting in that room, away from the demands and routines, something within me stirred. I had space to hear my own voice again. Not the voice of the leader. Or the coach. Or the achiever.
But my voice. And I knew then - “It’s time to stop building around what’s expected of me - and start building around what’s true to me.”
That reset led to some difficult decisions. I chose to walk away from certain expectations, opportunities, redefine my life, my business model, and make room for work that reflected who I was becoming, not just who I had been. It wasn’t easy. But it was necessary. And the fulfilment that followed confirmed it was right.
We often associate pausing with slowing down, falling behind, or being unsure. But in leadership, resetting is a strength. It means you’re paying attention. It means you’re willing to re-evaluate what no longer aligns. It means you’re choosing to thoughtfully create legacy over momentum.
I’ve learnt that the best leaders aren’t those who never change direction. They’re the ones who create space to notice when change is needed, and have the courage to respond.
If any part of this speaks to your current season, take a quiet moment and ask yourself;
“Where in my life or leadership have I been running on autopilot… and what might shift if I allowed myself to pause and truly listen?”
As is stated in this quote inspired by Viktor Frankl;
Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space lies our freedom and our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our happiness.
Your next aligned step might not be loud or dramatic, it might simply begin with making room for a pause.
